Monday, February 15, 2010

I am, who I am, who I am, well... who am I?

As I enter this time in life between college and a career, between leaving an old home and making a new one, a place where stereotypically a lot of 20-somethings experience a quarter-life crisis, a lack of an identity, or a forceful and sometimes failing attempt at trying to make a new one, I value certain aspects of my own personality and characteristics of just who I am that define me as a person.

I'm self-aware, self-righteous, self-deprecating, self-indulgent, self-disciplined, self-reliant, and self-absorbed. I'm obsessive compulsive; I make my bed every morning, label my play lists perfectly, color and style coordinate my closet, never leave trash in my car, organize and re-organize my DVDs; most people are surprised I don't have weird breathing exercises or count things multiple times before I can use them. I'm a neat-freak, I take at least two showers a day, wash my hands too much, and brush my teeth just as often. I'm admitably a metro-sexual, which I thank my always fashionable older sister for. I grew up a complete and total mama's boy, and consider my dad my best friend. I have a freakishly good memory, I know the words to probably over 75% of the 3500 songs on my iTunes. I graduated from Tyler Junior College in May of 2007 with an Associates of the Arts degree in Behavioral Science and from The University of Texas at Tyler with a Bachelor in Human Resource Development in December of 2009 with a 3.4, and can honestly say I did both having never studied a day in my life. I consider myself and try continuously to be well informed on political issues, yet I have never voted. I've broken hearts, and had mine broken, and know that both are likely to happen again before it's all said and done. I have no idea what I believe in religiously, and I don't think that makes me a bad person. I'd rather be honest and open than lie to myself or anyone else and be a hypocrite.I love meeting new people, but most of my best friends have been so since I was in grade school. My idols are Lance Armstrong, Michael Jordan, Chuck Palahniuk, Pete Sampras, and yes, Justin Timberlake. I don't like Christmas. I'm not the Grinch or Scrooge (or Satan) and try to ruin anyone else's, I've just never enjoyed the holiday for personal reasons and that's okay. I also hate Valentines Day. I'm an Aries, and I have no idea what that means. I'm an Organ Donor. Not sure that I have any organs anyone will want by the time it's all said and done, but if they want them then by all means take them. I've lost many people close to me too soon, and I realize that life is a precious gift. I try to live everyday to the fullest, and encourage everyone else to do the same.

I'll be 23 in a few weeks, which amazes me, but I have had an amazing life. I've traveled all over the country, met some amazing and interesting people, had some of the best friends anyone could ever ask for, gone through ups and downs, been let down by just about everyone I've ever trusted, but I'm still happy to have the people I do in my life, and to have gotten to do the things I have. I have no idea who I'll be in a year, a decade, another quarter-life, but I do know that I've been incredibly blessed, and that no matter what I'm going to have a positive attitude and be happy with the person I am. Because I always have been, and always will be, true to myself. And at the end of the day, that's really the only thing you can control.

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